No parent enjoys it when their child suddenly starts crying in a public place. Between drawing the glares of annoyed passersby and wrangling a child who won't listen, it's an embarrassing scenario. But as a parent, what is the proper way to handle this situation?
When one woman's romantic dinner was ruined by a screaming child, she decided to confront the parents, but now, she's wondering if she went too far.
Going Out To A Restaurant
When people go out for a bite to eat, they are hoping to spend a couple of hours savoring delicious food and enjoying some peace and quiet.
But anything from a long waiting time to poor service can ruin your mood and what you'd hoped would be a relaxing and indulgent night out. On the list of "things that could go wrong," how high up does a misbehaving child rank?
The Reddit Post
Reddit user Wrong_Ad_3951 posed the question to a subreddit and wanted to know if she was in the wrong for how she reacted to a family whose child wouldn't stop crying while at a restaurant eating dinner.
She begins the story by explaining that she and her boyfriend were out to dinner at a nice restaurant one night. While not a Michelin-starred restaurant, the establishment is still known for offering delicious food, and so she and her boyfriend were expecting an enjoyable evening.
A Ruined Evening
Partway into the meal, the girlfriend noticed two parents and three children, ranging in age from 2 to 10 years old, a couple of tables over. While they were enjoying their meal, the toddler all of a sudden started shrieking.
"When I say shrieking I'm talking about the ear piercing type that is physically painful," she explains. "This goes on for about 10 minutes, and by this point, I'm getting annoyed, since I've paid to enjoy my meal, and the child isn't shutting up."
Take The Child Outside
Fed up with the incessant crying, the girlfriend walked over to the family and asked if someone could take the child outside until he calmed down since he was disturbing people's evening. The mother became angry and said her son is only a toddler and she should be compassionate instead.
The girlfriend responded that she'd paid good money to enjoy her meal and doubled down by saying she needed to do everyone a favor and take her son outside. After she sat back down, she noticed the mother flag down one of the servers.
The Situation Escalated
After she got the attention of a server, the mother told them that the girlfriend was terribly rude and was making her uncomfortable. A nearby patron overheard this conversation and told the server that the mom was lying and that she'd allowed her child to cry while other people were trying to eat.
"The parents left eventually, but not before shooting me an evil look," she says.
Am I The Bad Guy?
The girlfriend explains that she later told a friend about the incident and that the friend thought she should've been more considerate of the family since parenting is difficult. She responded by saying that they chose to have kids, and so "need to parent them better." But her friend didn't agree with her reasoning.
She then asks Reddit, "[Am I in the wrong] for asking a mother to leave a restaurant with her crying child?"
Taking Accountability
Reddit voted overwhelmingly in favor of the girlfriend in that she was not at fault, and that she was right to confront the parents for not controlling their child in a public setting.
"While being a parent IS difficult, there are still courtesies that need to be followed. Those courtesies include removing a child from a public place if they are not behaving, crying or screaming. This also teaches the child that their actions are not acceptable and that they will lose out on fun if they don't behave."
Could've Handled It Better
However, not everyone was on the girlfriend's side. Some users said that while she was right to be upset, she should have had a manager address the situation instead of trying to parent-shame them herself.
"I used to work at a restaurant and have been in restaurants when children have been screaming. It sucks but those parents definitely didn't need you to come over there and tell them that. There are so many better ways to handle the situation."