There comes a time in everyone's life when it suddenly dawns on them—they’re not the youngest generation anymore.
Maybe you’ve found yourself sounding like your dad, grumbling about your knees whenever it rains, or become the person who declines Saturday night plans if they start after 8 PM. These are just some of the signs that make people realize they’re getting older.
Compost Bin > Fashion
Reddit user whereaswalda shared, "I spotted a mannequin at Target dressed in a super short jumper and blurted out, 'That's way too short! Who could wear this without feeling uncomfortable? It wouldn’t even pass the fingertip test!'
My husband just laughed and gently guided me away so we could check out the new bin I wanted for my compost. I’ve officially become That Lady, and honestly, I’m a little embarrassed."
Don't They Know The Speed Limit In A Residential Area?!
Reddit user TwiggyStarbust wrote, "This morning, I was standing on my porch sipping coffee when a car sped by, and I immediately thought, 'That's way too fast.’"
Speeding is never okay, especially when kids are nearby!
You've Got To Take Care Of Your Back
TopMacaroon said, "Had a fascinating chat with friends about which office chairs offer the best lumbar support."
I bet half of those folks once swore they'd never take an office job themselves.
Since When Do You Care About Vegetables?
Reddit user moronomer shared, "When my wife asked if she needed to grab anything from the store, I said, 'I think we're out of asparagus.'"
"Honestly, I have no idea what kind of wicked spirit made me say that."
Youths Just Blasting Their Music All Over The Place
Reddit user 1992_City_Champs wrote, "I was complaining to a coworker about these noisy kids next door. I actually said, 'goddamn teenagers and their Bluetooth machines.'
"I still stand by what I said, but honestly, that felt like my biggest moment of growing up since I started driving a sensible Toyota."
You'll Be Asleep By 9 PM After One Glass Of Wine
My housemate: "You want a drink?"
Me: "Nah, man. I haven't had a drink in… six months maybe? More?"
My housemate: "You stopped drinking?"
Me: "I’m not *sober* or anything, it’s just that alcohol makes me sleepy."
Caffeine After Noon Is A Risk
"'Oh no thank you. I can't have caffeine this late in the day or I'll never get to sleep tonight.'
"My spouse was offering me the last soda from the fridge. It was 1 pm." — Reddit / FriendlyFishstix
Even Stretching Won't Always Fix It
"I slept wrong and haven't been able to turn my head for three days."
You wake up one morning and somehow you’ve twisted your wrist or thrown out your back. And then you're stuck with it, like it’s never going to get better.
Stick To The Meal Plan
"You want to go out for dinner? Oh no, I can't; I have chicken in the fridge that I have to cook before it goes bad." — Reddit / MehMeh0003
Having the "we have food at home" conversation with yourself is always a tough moment.
Turn The Light Off When You Leave The Room
""When you leave a room, turn the light OFF!" I've become my dad....." — Reddit / TheGoodJudgeHolden
Someone in the household has to take on the financial responsibility of turning off all the lights.
Anyone Slightly Younger Is Now Considered A Child
"I was so annoyed in my 20s when people treated me like a child. Now I'm 31, hired an intern (aka fully grown 20-year-old man)."
"I find myself saying, he was a nice boy." — Reddit / kgbeattie
How Can The Youth Of Today Stand This Music?
"I tried listening to the iTunes top 100 yesterday for a change of pace and it all sounded like hot garbage, 'WHAT ARE KIDS EVEN LISTENING TO THESE DAYS?!'"
The fact that they're even still listening to iTunes instead of a streaming platform shows their age.
Don't Even Think About Touching The Thermometer
"Quit touching the god damn thermostat, you're driving the bill up." — Reddit / trippedwire
If you're cold go put a sweater on, you don't need to crank the heat up.
Doesn't Everyone Know What That Is Now?
"I had a classmate who was probably just old enough to drink ask me if I knew what a meme was."
"I almost died. I'm 30, not dead." — Reddit / MadisonApplegate
It's Hard to Find A Sturdy Dresser Nowadays
"'They just don't make them like they used to' them being good wood dresser" — Reddit / CoconutSunshine
A good piece of solid furniture that's also reasonably priced can bring you a lot of joy.
"Get Off My Lawn You Pesky Kids!!"
"After recently installing a replacement security camera, I saw in the saved footage some kids repeatedly riding their bikes and/or playing in my driveway, occasionally hitting the shrubs that line the driveway and scattering gravel/compost around."
"I found myself ranting to my wife, wanting to know why these kids were constantly in my driveway. Then I froze, and realized... I'd become that guy. That old guy." — Reddit / hughnibley